Countdown To Doomsday

Happy Preppers Stock Piling For Doomsday

 

 

In 3 days we’re gonna finally find out if the Mayan’s were mind fucking us all by abruptly ending their calendar on the first day of our winter solstice- December 21st 2012. This has caused panic from people around the world believing civilization will cease to exist when the calendar ends.

Since the Mayans didn’t say exactly IF the world would end on that day, some occult writers, bloggers and new age visionaries are cashing in on peoples paranoia and have prophesied several doomsday scenarios ;  The planet Nibiru will emerge from its hiding place behind the sun and smash into the earth; A super black hole at the centre of the universe will suck in our planet and smash it to pieces;  The Mother Ship finally lands and takes over our planet; 3 days of darkness followed by the chosen one’s ascending to the 5th dimension leaving the rest of us behind with Chris Brown and RiRi.

I’m all worked up and more excited about the pending Apocalypse than I am for Christmas!

I keep trying to change the holiday party conversation from ‘What’s your phone plan like? ’ to ‘Hey, how you plan on spending your last few day’s on earth?’    I don’t get much feedback since people would rather talk about more ‘cheery’ things while wearing their ugly Christmas sweaters and sipping on their egg nog.  Sigh.

TLC’s ‘Livin’ For The Apocalypse-Ready For War’

Maybe I’d get the convo I’m craving if I was hanging out with the fine American folks from TLC’s “Livin’ For The Apocalypse-Ready For War’. These people  have been preparing for the end of the world for years,  “If this country was ever invaded, I’d be on top of the Indian camp with my guns, my preparedness products, and my food.  I wouldn’t go down without a fight!”

Yup. Guns, Food and Fear.  That about sums up America.

Apparently, so many people in the states are freaking out about the doomsday rumours that the American government had to post a blog last week reassuring the masses  to calm the fuck down!

“NASA has received thousands of letters concerned about the end of the world. David Morrison, a planetary astronomer and senior scientist for NASA who answers questions from the public about astrobiology, says, “At least a once a week I get a message from a young person ― as young as 11 ― who says they are ill and/or contemplating suicide because of the coming doomsday.”

‘Preppers UK’

The American’s aren’t the only one’s who are counting down til the end world- Meet UK’s “The Preppers” they have built emergency store cupboards filled with food, stock piling petrol, weapons, and even condoms, have secret remote hideaways, getaway trailers ready to escape in 15 minutes, nuclear and chemical weapon suits and even an inflatable canoe.

National Geographic Channel-“PREPPERS, UK’: SURVIVING ARMAGEDDON”

So what if NOTHING happens? What if the Four Horseman don’t show up on December 21st 2012?

A collective sigh will be heard around the world on December 22nd,when we have to get up in the morning and get on with it, just like we did the last time it was supposed to end, and the time before that….

We get to laugh at the rest of the assholes who spent their life saving’s building bunkers, boats and fall out shelters, surrounded by amo, canned beans and walkie talkies still waiting for the Big IT to arrive.

*Funny thing, the more research I did while writing this post over the last couple of days, the less exciting this topic became to me. I’ll go back to wrapping my Christmas presents and write my list of New Years Resolutions that I’ll probably break by January 2nd 2013.*

This is a clip from one of my fav comics, who sums it all up best, BILL HICKS-IT’S JUST A RIDE 

 

Living In Fear Ain’t No Way To Live.  

Thank you Mayan’s for fucking with us and teaching us a lesson.  WE get to define what happens next.

How about you? Are you getting ready for Armageddon or think it’s all a crock of shit?

Love to hear from you….cause you know, we’re all in this ride together.

Love and Light,

Yoko